A life lived at full speed is not a life of contemplation. There can be excitement, thrill, exhilaration, sure. But without the pauses, the quiet moments, exciting can turn into manic, thrilling can turn into mundane, and exhilarating loses its edge.

The quiet moments in life are there to take a breath, to think back, to reflect, and to be self-aware. Self-aware is different to self-absorbed, self-centred, or self-obsessed. Self-aware references others, and is considerate of how one is perceived. Self-aware is conscious of the impact one has on the world around, and is intrinsically focused on not overstepping, not being overbearing, and not overstaying one’s welcome.

Knowing how to relate to the pauses, the contemplative spaces in one’s life is invaluable. But first comes being able to recognise a pause when it presents itself. Without this awareness, it’s easy to try to fill every gap, every opportunity for quiet, with noise, bluster, and activity. Sometimes, all we have to do is stop, listen, and think about the possibilities.

Second, and perhaps more important, is knowing how to create a pause where none exists. A life without pauses can easily spiral out of control. The consequences can be dire and can range from helplessness to depression, to downright desperation. Feeling as though one is on a treadmill with no prospect of getting off is really a life devoid of hope. In my interpretation, at least.

So the goal is to listen and watch for the quiet spaces, and when they arrive, use them wisely. If life is lacking in these spaces, the challenge is in finding ways to create them. Ways to make them happen, and to do that on a regular basis. For it’s in the quiet spaces, the pauses, that we find nourishment, ideas, creativity, and the energy to connect with others in meaningful ways. It’s not a guarantee, but for me, these are some paths to contentment.